The Lifegiver Podcast with Corie Weathers
S6 E14 Restoring Trust after Deep Wounds Pt 2

S6 E14 Restoring Trust after Deep Wounds Pt 2

April 11, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

Restoring trust after it has been broken can be scary, confusing, and difficult to navigate.  Depending on if you are dealing small of large infractions, deep hurt in your relationship can be healed and restored.  In this episode, Matt and I talk about how you can ask for trust to be restored, or do the hard work to earn it back.  Even if you have been devastated by betrayal, there is hope.  Listen in and find out how. 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

Forgiveness: https://www.podbean.com/ew/pb-ajqyv-b8c9f1

My Strategy for Affair Recovery: https://www.podbean.com/ew/pb-5jwg4-b63b20

Here are some of the resources mentioned throughout the episode:

My interview with Dr. Mike Sytsma

Here is also my podcast on “Sin in a Christian Marriage” Part 1 & Part 2 

More Resources:

• Torn Asunder by Dave Carder. There is also a workbook available for this book. (faith based)

• Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity by Gary & Mona Shriver (faith based)

• Secrets to Surviving Infidelity by Scott Haltzman

• After the Affair by Janis Spring

Rebuilding Trust Video – Using the image of a “trust bucket,” Dr. Mike addresses rebuilding trust after an affair.

Setbacks in Marriage- The Podcast Episode
Women & the Tough Bible Verses– (Topic of Submission and gender roles in the Bible- Authentic Intimacy)
People Are More Important Than Marriage– Authentic Intimacy, When you shouldn’t fight for your marriage
Sexual Intimacy and Post Affair with Mike Sytsma
How do Affairs Happen? New Life Church, Brady Boyd

Articles:

So You’ve Hit a Marriage Setback: 3 Steps
Military Marriage: When to Separate
Mike Sytsma- Betrayal & Affair Recovery (articles and video)
Protecting Your Marriage from an Affair 

Books:

Mission Ready Marriage: My Life As An Active Duty Wife Claire Wood
Sacred Spaces: My Journey to the Heart of Military Marriage Corie Weathers

S6 E13 Restoring Trust after Deep Wounds

S6 E13 Restoring Trust after Deep Wounds

April 11, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

Restoring trust after it has been broken can be scary, confusing, and difficult to navigate.  Depending on if you are dealing small of large infractions, deep hurt in your relationship can be healed and restored.  In this episode, Matt and I talk about how you can ask for trust to be restored, or do the hard work to earn it back.  Even if you have been devastated by betrayal, there is hope.  Listen in and find out how. 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

Forgiveness: https://www.podbean.com/ew/pb-ajqyv-b8c9f1

My Strategy for Affair Recovery: https://www.podbean.com/ew/pb-5jwg4-b63b20

Here are some of the resources mentioned throughout the episode:

My interview with Dr. Mike Sytsma

Here is also my podcast on “Sin in a Christian Marriage” Part 1 & Part 2 

More Resources:

• Torn Asunder by Dave Carder. There is also a workbook available for this book. (faith based)

• Unfaithful: Hope and Healing After Infidelity by Gary & Mona Shriver (faith based)

• Secrets to Surviving Infidelity by Scott Haltzman

• After the Affair by Janis Spring

 

Rebuilding Trust Video – Using the image of a “trust bucket,” Dr. Mike addresses rebuilding trust after an affair.

Setbacks in Marriage- The Podcast Episode
Women & the Tough Bible Verses– (Topic of Submission and gender roles in the Bible- Authentic Intimacy)
People Are More Important Than Marriage– Authentic Intimacy, When you shouldn’t fight for your marriage
Sexual Intimacy and Post Affair with Mike Sytsma
How do Affairs Happen? New Life Church, Brady Boyd

Articles:

So You’ve Hit a Marriage Setback: 3 Steps
Military Marriage: When to Separate
Mike Sytsma- Betrayal & Affair Recovery (articles and video)
Protecting Your Marriage from an Affair 

Books:

Mission Ready Marriage: My Life As An Active Duty Wife Claire Wood
Sacred Spaces: My Journey to the Heart of Military Marriage Corie Weathers

S6 E12: Communication Part 2

S6 E12: Communication Part 2

March 22, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

Communication is the top issue couples ask for help with.  We all have different types of communication styles and often that clashes into conflict and hurt.  On top of that, no one teaches us how to communicate in healthy assertive ways. Instead, we grow up with passive, passive-aggressive, or aggressive examples to model.  Join Matt and I as we share our challenges to communicating over the distance of a deployment and tips for how you can make improvements in your own connection with your spouse. 

 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S6 E11: Communication

S6 E11: Communication

March 13, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

Communication is the top issue couples ask for help with.  We all have different types of communication styles and often that clashes into conflict and hurt.  On top of that, no one teaches us how to communicate in healthy assertive ways. Instead, we grow up with passive, passive-aggressive, or aggressive examples to model.  Join Matt and I as we share our challenges to communicating over the distance of a deployment and tips for how you can make improvements in your own connection with your spouse. 

 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S6 E10: Intimacy Pt 2

S6 E10: Intimacy Pt 2

February 14, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

Intimacy is a HUGE topic, especially for service couples.  In this episode, Matt and I address sexual intimacy and many of the other types of intimacy couples can use to connect.  Believe it or not, experts say there is between 5 and 40 different types of intimacy. We take some of the most popular questions surrounding intimacy, especially for couples who have to spend time apart. Don't miss this one!

 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S6 E9: Intimacy Pt 1

S6 E9: Intimacy Pt 1

February 14, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

Intimacy is a HUGE topic, especially for service couples.  In this episode, Matt and I address sexual intimacy and many of the other types of intimacy couples can use to connect.  Believe it or not, experts say there is between 5 and 40 different types of intimacy. We take some of the most popular questions surrounding intimacy, especially for couples who have to spend time apart. Don't miss this one!

 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S6 E8 Parenting as a United Front Pt 2

S6 E8 Parenting as a United Front Pt 2

February 14, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

This episode answers some of your biggest questions about parenting- especially while apart.  Regardless of which stage you are in, there will always be times where you parent out of an imprinting from your own childhood or clash with your spouse on parenting techniques.  Listen in as we share some of what we have learned.

 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S6 E7 Parenting as a United Front

S6 E7 Parenting as a United Front

February 14, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

This episode answers some of your biggest questions about parenting- especially while apart.  Regardless of which stage you are in, there will always be times where you parent out of an imprinting from your own childhood or clash with your spouse on parenting techniques.  Listen in as we share some of what we have learned.

 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S6 E6 Holidays Apart Pt 2

S6 E6 Holidays Apart Pt 2

February 14, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

This episode covers how you as a couple can stay connected and on the same page during especially difficult Holidays, whether it is Christmas, Birthdays, or even an Anniversary.   Listen as Matt and I authentically share how we are doing and what tools we re using to stay connected.

 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S6 E5: Holidays Apart

S6 E5: Holidays Apart

February 13, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

This episode covers how you as a couple can stay connected and on the same page during especially difficult Holidays, whether it is Christmas, Birthdays, or even an Anniversary.   Listen as Matt and I authentically share how we are doing and what tools we re using to stay connected.

 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S6 E4: Ripping the Band-Aid Pt2

S6 E4: Ripping the Band-Aid Pt2

February 9, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

This episode talks about the feelings that come with having to say goodbye.  Everyone knows it is hard, but what if you feel a little bit of relief?  Is that wrong?  How do you set your sights forward and get on mission?  Plus a special guest joins in the discussion...

 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S6 E3: Ripping the Band-Aid Pt 1

S6 E3: Ripping the Band-Aid Pt 1

February 9, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

This episode talks about the feelings that come with having to say goodbye.  Everyone knows it is hard, but what if you feel a little bit of relief?  Is that wrong?  How do you set your sights forward and get on mission?  Plus a special guest joins in the discussion...

 

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S6 E2: The Tension Before You Go- Pt 2

S6 E2: The Tension Before You Go- Pt 2

February 9, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

This episode is Part 2 of The Tension Before You Go- So many couples struggle with tension and emotions all over the place before you rip the bandaid to spent that time apart.  Matt and Corie cover what they went through and what many other couples describe as one of the most challenging times a couple can go through in the military.

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S6 E1: The Tension Before You Go- Pt 1

S6 E1: The Tension Before You Go- Pt 1

February 9, 2021

The USO is launching a new virtual series with Corie and Matt Weathers on how military families can stay strong while apart. Corie and Matt Weathers will share how they are keeping their military marriage strong through a season apart - as well as tips for how you can do the same.

Tools and concepts discussed during the series apply to all types of military-initiated separations; from deployments and trainings, to geo-bachelor tours, unaccompanied tours, and even third shift schedules.

This episode is Part 1 of The Tension Before You Go- So many couples struggle with tension and emotions all over the place before you rip the bandaid to spent that time apart.  Matt and Corie cover what they went through and what many other couples describe as one of the most challenging times a couple can go through in the military.

To access the Series dashboard, including the videos and handouts: https://www.uso.org/campaign/mvp-youre-leaving-again

S5 FINALE: Know When to Hold’em, Know When to Fold’em

S5 FINALE: Know When to Hold’em, Know When to Fold’em

December 14, 2020

How do you decide when to hold steadfast and persevere?  When to walk away?  When to run away?  Life is a gamble, a risk.  We do everything we can to make good, right decisions with what we have in the moment.  Yet the hardest thing to do is walking away and saying "no".  It feels like too big of a risk.  Yet, this year has gotten too big for all of us- asking us to make a choice.  You can't do it all and neither can I. Listen in for updates on how 2020 affected me and what I am doing with the cards I have in hand.

 

Interested in Joining Fight Club- A Virtual Support Group for Military & First Responder Spouses?  Starts Jan 11, 2021 Apply here: https://forms.gle/RCf8jYnq5bdkEZiHA

The Gambler, by Kenny Rogers

On a warm summer's evening
On a train bound for nowhere
I met up with the gambler
We were both too tired to sleep
So we took turns a-starin'
Out the window at the darkness
The boredom overtook us
And he began to speak
He said, "Son, I've made a life
Out of readin' people's faces
Knowin' what the cards were
By the way they held their eyes
So if you don't mind my sayin'
I can see you're out of aces
For a taste of your whiskey
I'll give you some advice"
So I handed him my bottle
And he drank down my last swallow
Then he bummed a cigarette
And asked me for a light
And the night got deathly quiet
And his face lost all expression
Said, "If you're gonna play the game, boy
You gotta learn to play it right
You've got to know when to hold 'em
Know when to fold 'em
Know when to walk away
And know when to run
You never count your money
When you're sittin' at the table
There'll be time enough for countin'
When the dealin's done
Every gambler knows
That the secret to survivin'
Is knowin' what to throw away
And knowin' what to keep
'Cause every hand's a winner
And every hand's a loser
And the best that you can hope for
Is to die in your sleep"
And when he'd finished speakin'
He turned back toward the window
Crushed out his cigarette
Faded off to sleep
And somewhere in the darkness
The gambler he broke even
But in his final words
I found an ace that I could keep
You've got to know when to hold 'em
Know when to fold 'em
Know when to walk away
And know when to run
You never count your money
When you're sittin' at the table
There'll be time enough for countin'
When the dealin's done
 

Find resources for your service marriage at www.life-giver.org

Interested in joining the Lifegiver Facebook group to discuss this episode and more? Click here.

Music by Rudy Vaughn

S5 E21 A CURE to the Cough: The Weinberger Method

S5 E21 A CURE to the Cough: The Weinberger Method

November 23, 2020

What if I told you I found the cure for the common cough?  Well, it actually wasn’t me, but after our son fought an “Asthmatic cough” for four years we finally came across Dr. Weinberger and the “Habit Cough”.  Joining me for this episode is Dennis Buettner, a Cough Research Director for Dr. Miles Weinberger, MD. and a veteran that works with NASA.


Dennis’s daughter Bethany went through the same thing our son did- coughing up to 5,000 times a day with no answers. Like many of you out there who are trying to find answers, both of our families went through endless doctors, diagnoses, and medications before doctors finally threw up their hands with nothing left to offer. 

 

Dennis finally stumbled on some research about a pulmonologist who found the cure for the cough through suggestive therapy- teaching kids to be attentive to their bodies and stopping the cough in as little as 10 minutes! Bethany was able to stop her cough, so was our son, and now Dennis is spreading the word about how if you or someone you know can answer one question of his- you can stop the cough too.

 

Seriously, Dr. Weinberger has changed our lives. More importantly, he gave my son back his.
For more on Dr. Weinberger and the Habit Cough: https://www.habitcough.com/

Find resources for your service marriage at www.life-giver.org

Interested in joining the Lifegiver Facebook group to discuss this episode and more? Click here.

Interested in giving back?  Donate a couple of dollars to the podcast at Patreon.

Music by Rudy Vaughn

S5 E20 The Fear of Transition: Derek Abbey Pt 2

S5 E20 The Fear of Transition: Derek Abbey Pt 2

November 9, 2020

Derek Abbey, PhD joins me again!  I enjoyed my last conversation so much with Derek, I invited him back to share his research on transitioning into the veteran space. Derek says that there are important stages we should all go through in order to help us mature as well-functioning adults. The military sets the perfect conditions by providing almost everything we need as adults. It provides community, a way to progress through rank and accomplishment, and makes many of our decisions for us. 

 

Although the military “saved his life”, Derek shares what he has learned from helping veterans take the next big step in their lives in higher education and helping veterans take the next big step in their lives. The result was a fascinating conversation on what we all need to do to evolve to a better version of ourselves. 

 

Derek Abbey, PhD is a retired Marine and CEO of  Project Recover.

 

Find resources for your service marriage at www.life-giver.org

Interested in joining the Lifegiver Facebook group to discuss this episode and more? Click here.

Interested in giving back?  Donate a couple of dollars to the podcast at Patreon.

Music by Rudy Vaughn

S5 E19 Legacy with Derek Abbey, Project Recover

S5 E19 Legacy with Derek Abbey, Project Recover

October 26, 2020

Derek Abbey, PhD is a retired Marine and CEO of Project Recover joins me for a fascinating interview where we talk about the importance of leaving a legacy and how Project Recover is healing families’ stories.

 

 Project Recover, an international nonprofit that uses the latest in science, technology and archival research, with a mission to find and repatriate the remains of fallen American troops.

 

Derek Abbey says there are 82,000 Americans in uniform missing in the world today. Around 7,000 of those are from the Korean War, with another 1,600 missing from Vietnam and Southeast Asia. A staggering 72,000 are missing from World War II, a conflict in which sixteen million Americans served or about 12% of the population.

 

Here is a little of what we cover:

  • How his 23 years of military service, including his deployments to Iraq and the Far East as a fighter pilot, saved his own life and have influenced him to support the mission of finding and returning fallen service members home. Derek holds more combat hours than hours in peaceful skies, and also served with the Marine Raiders in Afghanistan.
  • WWII American troop discovery stories and first-hand insights on the overall recovery experience
  • How families can be impacted by loss for generations after a war has ended
  • Examples of how Project Recover leverages technology and partnerships with University of Delaware and Scripps Institution of Oceanography at the University of California San Diego in an attempt to find MIA soldiers
  • How Derek’s values centered approach guides his professional and personal life

 

Find resources for your service marriage at www.life-giver.org

Interested in joining the Lifegiver Facebook group to discuss this episode and more? Click here.

Interested in giving back?  Donate a couple of dollars to the podcast at Patreon.

Music by Rudy Vaughn

S5: E18 The Insanity Cycle: Matt and Corie

S5: E18 The Insanity Cycle: Matt and Corie

October 12, 2020

Matt and I did a webinar and Q&A on the Insanity Cycle that happens too often in marriage conflict. It was a two hour event, the first hour public and the second a private Q&A over Zoom with registered participants.

This is the first hour where Matt and I walk you through why couples find themselves looping sometimes on the same argument- for years. It is common for couples to get into an unhealthy pattern of triggering each other. Getting out of that pattern is the hard part. Once you start triggering each other, it is hard to get out of that downward spiral we call the Insanity Cycle. Are you ready to change the way you and your spouse fight? Are you ready to end the unhealthy patterns and get back to respecting each other?

 

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Here is some of what we cover in this episode:

  • A walk through the Insanity Cycle and how couples stay stuck in it
  • How a couple tends to include a Pursuer and a Withdrawer 
  • How you are both feeling and saying the same thing but not hearing each other
  • How the Pursuer and Withdrawer trigger each other to continue the Insanity Cycle
  • Ways you can stop the Cycle of hurt and destruction in your marriage
  • How you can play the "Maturity Game" speak lifegiving truth to your spouse

If you would like to hear Part 2, where we take your questions and dive deeper, you can find it on the LG Shop! This digital download includes Part 1 & 2 Videos as well as a listening guide to help you apply it to your life and marriage.  While you're there, take a look at some of the other digital downloads as well!

 

 

BONUS: Anthony O’Neal College & COVID

BONUS: Anthony O’Neal College & COVID

October 5, 2020

It's a BONUS episode of The Lifegiver Podcast!  We knew wrapping up the parenting series would not be complete without talking about our youth and college age kids. There is a lot of anxiety on returning to college during COVID season and that is on top of the stress families already have about paying for college!  

Anthony O'Neal, author, speaker, and Dave Ramsey Personality joins us to talk about how right now could be one of the best times to go back to college debt-free.  Anthony wrote the best-selling book, "Destroy Your Student Loan Debt" and travels the country talking with parents and college students about how they can avoid the mistakes he did.  

Listen in as he shares his story, tells you how college is way more affordable than you think, and how you can take advantage of this season to make it more affordable. By the way, Anthony also grew up as a military kid with his father in the Army and understands the stressors of military life!  

Find out more about Anthony O'Neal Here: https://www.anthonyoneal.com/

or listen to his show on Youtube here: https://www.youtube.com/user/aonealministries

Find resources for your service marriage at www.life-giver.org
Interested in joining the Lifegiver Facebook group to discuss this episode and more? Click here.
Interested in giving back?  Donate a couple of dollars to the podcast at Patreon.
Music by Rudy Vaughn

 

S5 E17 Parenting Series: Corie Talks Raising Teens

S5 E17 Parenting Series: Corie Talks Raising Teens

September 28, 2020

It is the end of the Parenting Series on the Lifegiver Podcast! There have been so many wonderful guests during this season and Corie wraps it up with an episode about raising teens. Reflecting on Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, Corie explains how you can help your child through the difficulty of establishing better routines in the chaos of COVID and school as well as how helping them find their place of belonging can mean everything.

Maslow_s_Ladder9c6ki.png

Here is the Awareness Wheel, created by Couples communication that is referenced in this episode.  

awsmall.png

Listen to Corie's original episode on Maslow's Ladder: https://www.life-giver.org/the-secret-of-resilience/

Find resources for your service marriage at www.life-giver.org
Interested in joining the Lifegiver Facebook group to discuss this episode and more? Click here.
Interested in giving back?  Donate a couple of dollars to the podcast at Patreon.
Music by Rudy Vaughn

S5 Ep16 Parenting Series: Even the Bravest Kids Need a Knight

S5 Ep16 Parenting Series: Even the Bravest Kids Need a Knight

September 14, 2020

Sleep issues and separation anxiety are a real thing for so many parents.  With today's anxiety and fear during COVID and back to school criteria, children's fears can manifest at night leaving you frustrated, exhausted and hopeless. Without a good night's sleep, you and your children will struggle to function.  In this episode, I talk with Colleen, a dedicated spouse of a veteran and mom of three boys with a master’s degree in psychology. After years of sleep deprivation and exhaustion with her own son, Colleen was inspired to write her first book about a magical knight- a bear that was determined to protect children from their fears. She wanted to help other moms and young children which led to the creation of Sir William the Brave Knight. 

Listen in as she shares her story, hope for yours and some ways you can find your own peace and courage to help your children whatever they might be facing.

If you would like to find out more or order your own Sir William the Brave Knight: https://magicalorderofbraveknights.com

If you are interested in strengths coaching, please make an appointment at www.corieweathers.com.

Find resources (including the Lifegiver Newsletter) for your service marriage at www.life-giver.org

Interested in joining the Lifegiver Facebook group to discuss this episode and more? Click here.

Interested in giving back?  Donate a couple of dollars to the podcast at Patreon.

Music by Rudy Vaughn

S5 Ep15 Parenting Series: A New Way To Track Your Child’s ‘ESTEEM’

S5 Ep15 Parenting Series: A New Way To Track Your Child’s ‘ESTEEM’

August 31, 2020

“Few things are as difficult for parents as watching their kids struggle. It's especially hard not knowing how to help them!”

Now more than ever, mental health and behavioral issues are climbing which can be pretty scary as a parent. Many military and first responder families take the leap to get help from their child only to have to move or start over.  Do you ever feel like you are wasting precious time waiting for all of them to communicate and start making progress? How many times has your child acted out on a weekend and you wish the professional could have seen it themselves but they aren’t open until Monday?  Meet Tommy Black. He’s a clinician that teamed up with some other really cool professionals that made an app to get your child’s wellness back into your hands again. ESTEEM is an app that helps parents track their child’s emotional and behavioral challenges.  Complete with resources, tracking software, and more, you can have complete control of your child’s healthcare at your fingertips.  Receive automated goals that encourage progress. Celebrate small wins that add up to big improvements! ESTEEM also makes it super easy to have teachers, counselors, and any other other professionals share important information about how your child is doing in one place so you can make the best decision for your child. Join us as we talk about why he created the app as well as some really encouraging words about how you can parent through the COVID crisis.  You will love this interview!

 

Download the ESTEEM App today: https://www.chooseesteem.com/

 

If you are interested in strengths coaching, please make an appointment at www.corieweathers.com.

Find resources (including the Lifegiver Newsletter) for your service marriage at www.life-giver.org

Interested in joining the Lifegiver Facebook group to discuss this episode and more? Click here.

Interested in giving back?  Donate a couple of dollars to the podcast at Patreon.

Music by Rudy Vaughn

S5 Ep 14 Parenting Series: COVID & Public School

S5 Ep 14 Parenting Series: COVID & Public School

August 17, 2020

What kind of relationship do you have with the public school system?  Does it give you anxiety?  Do you feel like you are always trying to advocate for your child- especially if you relocate a lot?  What if we could all work together (better) just a little bit more? What if (like any other relationship) we listened more and built a relationship of understanding?

I invited Dr. Keith Mispagel, superintendent of Fort Leavenworth School District 207 to the podcast. He has a doctorate in military child transition and studied what kids need to be resilient and thrive academically.  Even more, his district transitions almost 1,200 new military families every summer for the Command and General Staff College that teaches some of our military's most competitive officers  To put it plainly, he is a rockstar leading his staff in welcoming and helping children of all ages transition only to do it all again the next year.  I can honestly say it was the best year ever for my kids (who were weary of transition as it was).  He is now teaching other districts how to build better relationships with military parents and kids.

Listen in as we talk about the school-parent relationship and what the public schools are going through to make the next year a safer one for our kids.

 

If you are interested in strengths coaching, please make an appointment at www.corieweathers.com 

Find resources (including the Lifegiver Newsletter) for your service marriage at www.life-giver.org

Interested in joining the Lifegiver Facebook group to discuss this episode and more?  Click here.

Interested in giving back?  Donate a couple of dollars to the podcast at Patreon.

Music by Rudy Vaughn

S5 E13 Parenting Series: Back to school & COVID

S5 E13 Parenting Series: Back to school & COVID

August 3, 2020

Are you struggling with making a decision about whether your kids should go back to school with COVID numbers still climbing?  This is possibly one of the most stressful decisions our culture of parents have ever had to make. If your kids have been in private or public school settings pre-COVID, how do you decide whether they go back when there are reports of children dying?  In this Lifegiver LIVE, we talk about the questions I’m hearing in my sessions as well as questions you’ve submitted.  We talk about 

  • How to talk with your kids about this decision 
  • Their opinions about COVID
  • How schools are shifting standards
  • How to calm your anxiety about this decision

If you are interested in strengths coaching, please make an appointment at www.corieweathers.com 

Find resources (including the Lifegiver Newsletter) for your service marriage at www.life-giver.org

Interested in joining the Lifegiver Facebook group to discuss this episode and more?  Click here.

Interested in giving back?  Donate a couple of dollars to the podcast at Patreon.

Music by Rudy Vaughn

S5 Ep 12 The PROS & CONS of How The Job Changes Us

S5 Ep 12 The PROS & CONS of How The Job Changes Us

July 15, 2020

I couldn't be more excited to have Sarah back with me for another episode of the podcast.  Sarah joined me last season for the round table discussion and again on our faith based episode of Where is God in the Dark Places. Sarah is married to a SWAT officer and she shares some of what she wishes she would have known in her early days as a newly married LEO wife. Any job can "change you" and the service profession can definitely have an impact on a person's way of handling life, kids, other people, and even our marriage.  But in this conversation, Sarah shares how she has learned to embrace some of those changes as strengths and which have become an area she and her husband can work around or talk through if needed.  

If you are interested in strengths coaching, please make an appointment at www.corieweathers.com 

Interested in joining the Lifegiver Facebook group to discuss this episode and more?  Click here.

Interested in giving back?  Donate a couple of dollars to the podcast at Patreon.

Music by Rudy Vaughn

 

S5E11: Soul Recovery- Brian Flanery from ReBoot

S5E11: Soul Recovery- Brian Flanery from ReBoot

June 30, 2020

I have been a long time fan of Reboot Recovery-

"REBOOT helps people overcome trauma through faith-based programs. Our courses, training and online community are open to anyone connected to military or first responders. If the same old therapy or medication has left you feeling hopeless, you've come to the right place. At REBOOT, we’re overcoming trauma together and can't wait for you to join us."

In this episode, Bryan Flanery a veteran who struggles with TBI, shares his story of trauma, faith, and how the genuine relationships of those behind Reboot changed his life.  You will be changed by this episode.  Contact Reboot for more on how you can get involved, find a small group and get the support you need as a military or first responder couple.

Hear more of Bryan's story here: https://neveralonemilitary.com/stories/view/bryan-flanery 

Interested in subscribing to the Lifegiver Newsletter? Subscribers get discounts on their first session with Corie and find more information on building a community of Lifegivers. Click here to subscribe. 

Want to give back?  Send a monthly cup of coffee to keep us going by being a supporter on our patreon page: https://www.patreon.com/lifegiver

S5E10: Tips & Perspective from a NG Spouse (Cierra)

S5E10: Tips & Perspective from a NG Spouse (Cierra)

June 15, 2020

My good friend Cierra joins the podcast to talk about her experiences as a National Guard spouse.  We so often hear about the challenges of National Guard families- that they don't have access to the programming active duty families have and that living in the civilian community can be isolating. So in this interview, Cierra shares her experience of deployment while living in the civilian community and the challenges National Guard life brings into their marriage.  National Guard and Reserves are now deploying just as much as active duty and Cierra gives fantastic tips on how she has learned to manage the home, school, and work while also building a connected marriage.  

Interested in subscribing to the Lifegiver Newsletter? Subscribers get discounts on their first session with Corie and find more information on building a community of Lifegivers. Click here to subscribe. 

Want to give back?  Send a monthly cup of coffee to keep us going by being a supporter on our patreon page: https://www.patreon.com/lifegiver

S5E9: Loss & Love Again with Mary-Anne Rubado Kline

S5E9: Loss & Love Again with Mary-Anne Rubado Kline

May 26, 2020

Loss can be a terribly difficult thing to talk about- especially when we exist in a lifestyle where it is both a fear and reality. We need to be able to talk about it and learn from those who have gone through it and found happiness again.  In this Memorial Day special, Mary-Ann Rubado Kline joins the podcast to share the loss of her first husband, Charlie, during their first deployment while stationed in Colorado. She is now married to Jeremiah, a veteran and first responder. I ask her tough questions about what it is like to love again, how Jeremiah allows space for the time she lived with Charlie, and more.

It is important to hear the stories of those who have gone through great pain. It acknowledges a Sacred Space that they lived through and were changed by. Even though this may be difficult for some of you to hear, I hope you will listen.  There are so many wonderful truths and so much wisdom found in my interview with her. I have no doubt you will be encouraged and inspired to live and love more fully.

Thank you Mary-Anne for sharing your heart and being so vulnerable with us!

Interested in subscribing to the Lifegiver Newsletter? Subscribers get discounts on their first session with Corie and find more information on building a community of Lifegivers. Click here to subscribe. 

Want to give back?  Send a monthly cup of coffee to keep us going by being a supporter on our patreon page: https://www.patreon.com/lifegiver

S5E8: Kellie Artis with Moving the MILLIE Way

S5E8: Kellie Artis with Moving the MILLIE Way

May 15, 2020

It is PCS (Permanent Change of Station) Season and if you listened to season 4 of Lifegiver, you know I struggle when it is time to uproot!  MILLIE has been growing over the years in their efforts to make it easier for you to transition, and I need a whole lot of that!  In this episode, Kellie Artis joins me to share not only how MILLIE can connect you to other service families in your new location, but how you can be fully prepared in finding housing, handling logistics, and more.  We even talk about the emotional and psychological impact of starting over.  Don't miss this one! For more on MILLIE: check out their website, Facebook group, and all their toolkits to help you in the process!

 

Interested in subscribing to the Lifegiver Newsletter? Subscribers get discounts on their first session with Corie and find more information on building a community of Lifegivers. Click here to subscribe. 

Want to give back?  Send a monthly cup of coffee to keep us going by being a supporter on our patreon page: https://www.patreon.com/lifegiver

S5E7: Milkids, The Voluntold Force- with Becky Porter (MCEC)

S5E7: Milkids, The Voluntold Force- with Becky Porter (MCEC)

April 29, 2020

When you are a parent, you will do anything for your child(ren).  As a military family that moves a lot, a lot of thought and stress goes into making sure your child has everything they need to succeed.  Especially when you volunteered for this lifestyle and they were born into it.  In this episode, I invite Becky Porter, CEO of Military Child Education Coalition to share what they are doing to make all of this easier for military parents and educators. 

If you are a first responder family, this episode is still for you!  Listen in to the vast resources that MCEC is offering that everyone can benefit from.

 

Interested in subscribing to the Lifegiver Newsletter? Subscribers get discounts on their first session with Corie and find more information on building a community of Lifegivers. Click here to subscribe. 

Want to give back?  Send a monthly cup of coffee to keep us going by being a supporter on our patreon page: https://www.patreon.com/lifegiver

Bonus: Matt and Corie Join the USO to Answer Your Marriage Questions

Bonus: Matt and Corie Join the USO to Answer Your Marriage Questions

April 21, 2020

The world looks a whole lot different lately.  COVID-19 has the entire world on lockdown (or so it feels).  We are all doing our part to stay at home, some of you have PCS and deployment orders that are delayed.  Regardless of your situation, this has a great impact on your marriage.  You might be spending more time with your spouse than ever before and that can definitely cause tension.  In this episode, Matt and I share our conversation with the USO during their Coffee Connections Live event.  We answered questions about communication, growth in your marriage, holding each other accountable, as well as how to help your spouse open up. If you are looking for more support, check out the USO for not only ways to give back, but for how they are also looking to invest in your overall wellbeing with their programming for spouses!

Here are a few of the resources mentioned: 

 feelingswheel.jpg

 

Favorite Resources: https://drive.google.com/file/d/10Kl4WnHjnhUerU1cOc58nb3tHF7Ru8Tm/view?usp=sharing

Sacred Spaces: https://www.life-giver.org/sacred-spaces/

Forgiveness: https://www.life-giver.org/forgiveness-in-affair-recovery-gods-design-in-marriage/

S5E6: Late Night Lifegiver: Matt and Corie Review Mr. Rogers Movie

S5E6: Late Night Lifegiver: Matt and Corie Review Mr. Rogers Movie

April 15, 2020

Join Matt and Corie Weathers for a special "Late Night with Lifegiver"- an impromptu sit down after watching "A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood" with Tom Hanks.  

This movie was so touching, Matt and Corie had to sit down to talk about it.  Other things mentioned:

Benjamin Zander Tedtalk: "The Transformative Power of Classical Music"

Interested in subscribing to the Lifegiver Newsletter? Subscribers get discounts on their first session with Corie and find more information on building a community of Lifegivers. Click here to subscribe. 

Want to give back?  Send a monthly cup of coffee to keep us going by being a supporter on our patreon page: https://www.patreon.com/lifegiver

S5E5: You Are What You Believe with Dr. Kendra Lowe

S5E5: You Are What You Believe with Dr. Kendra Lowe

April 1, 2020

Dr. Kendra Lowe knows the challenges service members face as she is a Veteran herself. When she switched to the civilian life Dr. Kendra was surprised to note that she experienced just as much stress as a spouse as she experienced while in the service. 

"The concepts and perspectives derived from Dr. Lowe’s decade-long research, aims to provide command teams with an operational approach to combat the mission degrading effects of military spouse stress." 

There is stress for spouse and it's significant. We know that. But what now?

Her book answers that question. 

Dr. Kendra has created a resource that walks the reader through 8 weeks of changing their thought processes. Her website states: This comprehensive and invaluable tool will help you accept the unique nature of military life, anticipate and persevere in the face of social-emotional setbacks, practice effective coping strategies, and learn to thrive on to new possibilities. Read more:

Resources:

Dr. Kendra's website

Her book titled Wake Up, Kick Ass, Repeat: A Guide to Self Perseverance Within the Military Spouse Life Cycle 

Interested in subscribing to the Lifegiver Newsletter? Subscribers get discounts on their first session with Corie and find more information on building a community of Lifegivers. Click here to subscribe. 

Want to give back?  Send a monthly cup of coffee to keep us going by being a supporter on our patreon page: https://www.patreon.com/lifegiver

Bonus: Lifegiver LIVE Coronavirus Forcing Families into Homeschool

Bonus: Lifegiver LIVE Coronavirus Forcing Families into Homeschool

March 20, 2020

To the surprise of, well, everyone... kids who were in public schools are now at home facing a homeschool-like situation.  Parents are now scrambling trying to balance remote work, parenting, quarantines, and now overseeing their child's education.  If you are feeling overwhelmed, Jennifer Hamrick has words of encouragement for you. You can love your child and be a fantastic parent and still be very unhappy with this new situation.  Listen in as Jennifer shares great tips for how to manage a house full of kids and still have time for you.

Bonus: Lifegiver LIVE Matt Interviews Army Chaplains on Sustaining Care & Community

Bonus: Lifegiver LIVE Matt Interviews Army Chaplains on Sustaining Care & Community

March 20, 2020

Matt interviews two US Army Chaplains about how they are creatively sustaining community and care using social media and other platforms.  With the introduction of the Coronavirus, ministry teams and churches are looking to find new ways to care for each other, embrace the newest generations, and connect online rather than face to face.

Lifegiver Live: Coronavirus Bonus Episode 1

Lifegiver Live: Coronavirus Bonus Episode 1

March 18, 2020

Matt and I do our first live streaming episode where we talk about the impact of the virus on our community.  We specifically talk about how to handle the tension of being quarantined in your home 24/7 with your spouse and children. For our community, couples are often not used to being around each other all the time or as FR families are now facing long hours with an invisible enemy. Listen in for tips to navigate your conversations.  Here are a couple of resources we mention:

 feelingswheel.jpg

gestalt-therapy-1-14-638.jpg

 

Interested in subscribing to the Lifegiver Newsletter? Subscribers get discounts on their first session with Corie and find more information on building a community of Lifegivers. Click here to subscribe. 

Want to give back?  Send a monthly cup of coffee to keep us going by being a supporter on our patreon page: https://www.patreon.com/lifegiver

S5E4: What’s on the Backburner?

S5E4: What’s on the Backburner?

March 15, 2020

Join us as we take a moment to assess how we as service families are doing and what we can do to influence the change we need in our own lives.

The Blue Star Families survey results were recently released and, not surprisingly, it was noted that we are struggling in several key areas. Listen in as Corie unpacks these and provides tips on how to ask for what you need.

If you are a spouse and feel relegated to the back burner, we understand. We know that it's often where we have to go... mission first. However, you can't stay there indefinitely. Your marriage can't stay on the back burner indefinitely. In this episode Corie talks about what to do if you are struggling with the way things are.

As always, we at Lifegiver strive to encourage you give your spouse the benefit of the doubt (regardless of whether he or she is the serving or supporting spouse). Assume your spouse is trying their best, and in light of that, assume that they want what's best for you. Being assertive and asking for what you need is absolutely okay and your spouse will probably be glad not to have to read your mind.

Interested in subscribing to the Lifegiver Newsletter? Subscribers get discounts on their first session with Corie and find more information on building a community of Lifegivers. Click here to subscribe. 

Want to give back?  Send a monthly cup of coffee to keep us going by being a supporter on our patreon page: https://www.patreon.com/lifegiver

S5E3: Marriage Makes Us All Better

S5E3: Marriage Makes Us All Better

March 1, 2020

Bree Carroll is an engineer using her skills as an event coordinator and wedding planner. 

When Bree saw some marriages around her fail mostly due to a lack of resources to help them get through the challenges they faced.  The resources were too hard to find. Not complied. suicides 
As a person of action she made the leap from spectator on the sideline to influencer, making it her mission to connect those hurting to those who have the ability to help.

One of Bree's passions is wedding planning so watching marriages fall apart is counter to her very existence. 

Read more... 

Bree Carroll's resources:

Hearts and Stripes Podcast

Meet Bree

Other resources mentioned:

Come Home Project

 

 

S5E2: Heather Ehle with Project Sanctuary

S5E2: Heather Ehle with Project Sanctuary

February 15, 2020

What we discuss:

In this episode Heather shares her story about being a Registered Nurse and her introduction to the challenges military families face. Because the stress of the lifestyle affects whole family she wanted to find a way to help an organization that was caring for the family unit.

When she didn’t find one that was serving whole families she created one. Project Sanctuary hosts 6-day retreats that focus on overcoming obstacles: financial, communication, family counseling, PTSD, and more. There are ten different locations and in 2020 there are 32 retreats planned.

Two hours a day are spent in therapeutic sessions. There are incredible activities at each location including fishing, white water rafting, horseback riding, ziplining, and snowmobiling. Some of these are once-in-a-lifetime activities while other activities are able to be replicated once the family goes home (hiking or playing board games).

Licensed and trained counselors are on-site all week. Break-throughs on the part of both the veteran and the spouses occur at each retreat!

Once a family has been on the retreat they are welcome to return as volunteers.

Resources and Links: 

About Project Sanctuary

Apply to attend a retreat

 

PS: Jennifer here... My family was able to attend a Project Sanctuary retreat at Snow Mountain Ranch and I had two personal breakthroughs during the PTSD session. As a Chaplain's wife I figured I'd heard most of the stuff they were going to cover so the fact that I had two major breakthroughs I didn't know I needed was powerful. One is related to a minor change in my husband after deploying twice. After two tours he started bouncing his leg while sitting and it was incredibly annoying. (Still is, to be honest.) In the PTSD session the speaker mentioned that this is a common side effect of combat trauma. I constantly asked him to stop doing this. The PTSD session mentioned this was a natural and healthy way to release tension and that my asking him to stop was basically me asking him to keep that tension bottled up. The leg bouncing is still irritating but after that session I rarely ask him to stop. I see it for what it is now. 

The other breakthrough was having my own deployment-traumas validated. I didn't know that the supporting spouse could have legitimate traumas caused by deployment. I didn't face war. I didn't face danger. I didn't see death. And yet, I was changed and in some ways, the changes were strange to me. I got mad when my husband mowed the grass (it was my pet project during the 15 month deployment and he dared to touch it). I also didn't like for him to drive once he got back. I had spent the entire time taxiing the kids around and once he got back I didn't trust him behind the wheel. I had actual, physical manifestations of fear when he'd drive and he's a really good driver! Looking back I can see so clearly that both of these reactions were trauma-based but had no idea. How much easier reintegration would have been had we both known these things about ourselves and each other. 

These two breakthroughs were worth the time it took for us to drive from Texas to Colorado for our retreat but there were many other benefits and experiences that made it spectacular. It was, in a literal and figurative sense, a mountaintop experience. 

 

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